Bitter unspoken words have a special sound

Theater News Base: “Khorasan” newspaper further wrote: You probably know Mehrdad. You have heard the explanations of the ATMs and the announcement of the stations of the BRT lines with his voice, you have also watched a number of serials and movies on domestic platforms with his dubbing, but what you have heard is only Mehrdad’s voice, not his words. In today’s case, we are following the career of Mehrdad and another person who have gone through challenges and problems due to the mismatch between their voices and their gender.

I hid my voice

“Oh, sister, this is not a good word, and I have heard this bad word over and over again.” When Mehrdad enters puberty, he realizes the difference with his peers. As a child, it was not a problem because both girls and boys had a thin voice, but in middle school, challenges begin: “At school, I was exposed to a lot of jokes and ridicule. There were many strange looks and more strange questions: “Are you a girl or a boy?”, “If a boy, why are your voices like that?”. Some even thought I was deliberately speaking in that tone. I have heard many times: “It is not good for a boy to have such a voice at all”, “Try to speak manly”, “Aren’t you ashamed to speak like this?”. My self-esteem was very low. I considered my voice to be a defect. I remember writing down my words for a long time so that I would not have to talk to others. “For example, I wrote down my destination on a piece of paper so that the taxi driver would not hear my voice.”

Mehrdad says this kind of reaction has made his family very worried: “They were always worried about how I could handle myself. Friends and acquaintances constantly suggested that you take him to the doctor. “My family did not emphasize treatment because they did not consider my voice to be a disease, but they said, ‘If you want, think about having your larynx operated on.’

I was missing opportunities because of my forced silence

I ask Mehrdad why he did not take the treatment option seriously despite the harassment he was experiencing? “Honestly, I always liked my voice,” he says. Many days when I came home from school, I would lock myself in a closet so my family would not see me crying. Sometimes I wondered why I should have such a voice, but I always liked my voice. We had a medical acquaintance who said, “Why don’t you look at this as a blessing?” I have the same opinion now. I consider my voice a blessing that I must use in the right way. As I got older, my understanding and tolerance increased and I became stronger. Well, of course, I did not get to this point easily. I missed opportunities and opportunities just because I was embarrassed to speak in front of others or did not attend many gatherings at all now, but I am satisfied with my position. In the 12 years or so that I have been dubbing, I have become so interested in my work that I always think that if I went back, I would choose art instead of studying experimentally at school and choosing a biocellular-molecular field at university. At the same time that I received a lot of negative feedback about my voice, some people encouraged me to use my voice in the field of singing, narration and dubbing. Of course, at that time, choosing a career path based on interest and talent was not very popular and art was not valued, but finally in 1987-88, due to an acquaintance with an artist who is no longer with us, I entered a dubbing institute and while training, my work “I also started.”

Dubbing changed my life

Entering the field of dubbing changes the course of Mehrdad’s life: “I wanted to prove to my family that I can handle my life. The dubbing and narration class I enrolled in was out of my reach for a long time, until my work reached a level where they could lift their head and say that our child has such an ability and talent. Other experiences, such as military service, also helped me learn patience and resilience. Of course, the service had its difficulties, but it was useful to me. For some time during my service, I became the commander’s secretary. Everyone who called would immediately say, “I’m sorry, madam, I made a mistake,” and would hang up. My job was to constantly explain to people that they were not mistaken and that I was a soldier and that only my voice was different from what they expected. Our commander had welcomed this issue and said that this phone did not ring once a year before it came to you, now people call under various pretexts to hear your voice. “Some nights at the orphanage, I would read stories to the children or recite a poem that had a positive response.”

When it comes to positive reactions to Mehrdad’s particular voice, he recalls his interesting experience in talking to children: “What I have come to realize during this time is that children cope much better with differences than we do as adults. When I talk to them, regardless of my gender, they usually say, “What a beautiful voice you have, can you tell me a story?” “Of course, some of them may be surprised by my voice, but it is easier for them to understand and accept.”

Ryan Hassanlou’s account of his delicate voice that set the stage for him to sing

Ryan, 19, is from Shiraz and a psychology student. Like Mehrdad, he has a thin voice: “My father is in the business of selling tires and changing oil. In his work environment, my voice is a kind of stigma and is not accepted at all. Now, although I have gone through many hardships and many have become accustomed to my voice, my father is still ashamed of it. If he leaves his cell phone at home and I answer, the next day his co-workers tell him, “Your daughter said you didn’t take your phone.” Well, he’s upset too. When we have strangers, my father says if you want to sing in front of them, raise your voice a little. “Finally I sing.”

My singing sparked at school

Ryan started teaching guitar and singing a few years ago. The spark of his interest in singing has an interesting story: “When I was in the ninth grade, I realized that my voice was different from the rest. I thought my voice would get louder as I got older, but as time went on, the feminine voice matured. As I spoke, the children looked at me strangely. They would inform their friends and say, “Talk to us.” I was very annoyed. I once missed an English language test. I did not know we had an exam that day. The next day when I went to school, I found out that my grades were zero. I said to my language teacher, “Can I sing a memorized English song instead of an exam?”, He thought, joking. When the bell rang, he took me to the office with him. He grinned at the other teachers and said, “Mr. Hassanlou wants to read something to us.” The others smiled and continued to eat tea and biscuits. After a few minutes, the teachers picked up their cell phones one by one and began filming. When the song was over, they asked me to sing another piece for them, then another and then another. This was the first time I had sung in front of someone. The next bell announced my name on the school speaker. I thought the news of my singing reached the director and I would definitely be fired. When I went to the office, the principal and all the teachers were sitting around the table. I said hello with stress. The manager looked at me and said, “I heard you read well.” I was scared. That day and again and again in the following days my job was to perform music at school. “After that, I registered for a guitar and sound class, and now I am seriously working in the field of singing on my virtual page.”

Studying psychology helped me

Ryan is now happy with himself and his voice, but he is not satisfied with the easy way: “People do not have a good view of me and people like me. Their eyes are heavy on us. It is enough to start talking in a public space, for example in a shop, so that all heads turn to me. My relatives have been insisting for years that my voice is a disease and I have to cure it. They put so much pressure on me that I went to the doctor two or three years ago. “The sound is not changeable,” the doctor said, adding, “If I had such a sound, I would never have tried to change it. “Why don’t you use the sound so well?” Well, I loved my voice too. Although I often had to tell others that my job was dubbing. Because the dubbers have certain sounds, when I said this, they did not question me anymore, but now the situation has changed. My self-confidence has increased. “In family gatherings, I play and sing without embarrassment and receive positive feedback.”

Studying psychology has helped Ryan a lot: “I used to be upset if someone was surprised by my voice or questioned my personality, but now that I’re studying psychology, I know more about the reasons for others’ behavior. I understand that lack of information and lack of education is the cause of many people’s behaviors. In addition, psychology helps me take care of myself. “It is not at all unlikely that I will continue to face a lot of negative energies in the future. If I do not learn how to deal with them, I will be isolated.”

What do we learn from the experience of Mehrdad and Ryan?

Although Mehrdad and Ryan are now satisfied with their lives and situations, according to their own narration, they have gone through difficult days; Difficulties that were not a natural and inevitable part of life but unfair pressures imposed on them by ignorance; It is neither easy nor constructive to be constantly exposed to curious glances, insults, ridicule, and repeated questions about privacy. Has it not occurred to you that for years the rejection of a teacher’s leftist gaze, the misplaced joke of friendship, or the disrespectful sarcasm of a stranger left in your psyche and his reminders are a torment? Our ill-considered professions, views, and behaviors can lead people astray, no matter if we call this recklessness “joke,” “intimacy,” or “curiosity.”

Mehrdad and Ryan, with the help of personal abilities and luck – getting acquainted with the field of dubbing and entering the world of singing – were able to cope with annoying reactions and find their own way, but not everyone is so lucky. There are many people who become homeless and isolated due to personal differences, their talents are secretly wasted and they suffer psychological damage. Well, we might be one of the chains that leads to that point. When you come across a person whose voice or face or something in his body does not reach your eyes, ears and eyes and you consider yourself entitled to announce this difference out loud or ask about him, you are one of several people who own this Differences give the message of being “abnormal”. This situation may happen only once in your life and you simply forget it, but he experiences it again and again. He who can expend his energy and energy on important work or at least in his daily life, repeatedly encounters unnecessary reactions to which he must respond and rebuild his damaged psyche and receive the message of “abnormality” again and again. .