Recognize the wrong thoughts in our minds / What thoughts make us feel bad?

Family group:Humans wear different glasses from birth, which include perceptions and looks given to them from childhood by parents and others, spectacles that include perceptions and judgments. , Different rules and assumptions that make it possible for you to have different views of others, the world and different issues.

Assumptions like: The world is a dangerous place, someone can not be trusted, they put hats on our heads, men or women are unfaithful and … all of which make shortcuts in mind and make it easier for you to The purpose of judging others.

Man is not influenced by the objects themselves but by his perception of them. This perception is actually called cognitive errors by psychologists because they are generally not true and cause people to not see the facts and go wrong. According to cognitive psychologists, human beings are influenced by three factors: “thought”, “feeling” and “behavior”. Because first a thought enters a person’s mind, then an emotion is created in him, and then the person performs a behavior based on that feeling.

Misconceptions are the same as cognitive errors, as if you were wearing black-and-white or gray glasses in the colored world, and based on that you see the world and the world in gray. Now we can review the most common cognitive errors, in fact the same mental errors that ruin our mood.

1. Mind reading

Without evidence, you judge what others think. Like, “If he doesn’t say hello, he must be upset with me.”

2. Prediction

Predict that in the future everything bad will come out of the water and bad events and dangers are lurking. Like “I fail the exam”, “I lose my job”.

3. Disaster

You believe that whatever is bad and unbearable will happen. For example: “If this happens, disaster will happen”, “If my father dies …”

4. Labeling

Attributing bad and negative traits to oneself and others. Like “You are a miserable person” or “Someone is worthless.”

5. Ignoring the positive aspects

You make the positive actions of yourself or others seem trivial and insignificant. For example: “If I was accepted, I would not have done something important”, “If a person did a good deed, it would not matter”.

6. Negative filter

Always see the negative aspects of issues and ignore the positive issues. Like “nobody loves me”, “nobody cares about me”.

7. Extreme generalization

You always generalize negatively based on a bad or negative event. It’s like going on a trip and your tire pops up and you say, “I always have to have something bad happen to me on the trip,” or “It always has to be so that I don’t have fun.”

8. Zero and one hundred or bipolar thinking

You see the people around you or the events around you, either good or bad. For example, if you find a problem with someone, you must say that he never likes you or I always waste my time with worthless people. My professors have always asked me badly and give me a low grade.

9-Bidangari

You have the idea that you should always do everything with “should” and there is no “maybe” for you. Like, “You have to do everything well,” “You have to be the first student.” “You have to keep everyone happy.”

10-Personalization

Consider the cause of bad or negative accidents yourself. For example, if you went to a party and someone you did not pay attention to, say: You must have done something that he neglected you or it must have been wrong with you. Or, for example, if your marriage broke down, you must have been to blame.

11-Blame

You blame others for your problems and negative feelings, and you forget the responsibility of changing your behavior. Like: “Others make me angry” or “Others cause and cause all my problems”.

12-Regret or “I wish”

You may have seen some people who always have the bowl of “I wish” that “I wish I did not say this” or “I wish I did not go somewhere” and … that is, instead of thinking about the present and the future , I wish you had a bowl in your hand that I wish you had done something in the past.

13. Emotional reasoning

Use your emotions to interpret the issues and facts that have happened, such as “My heart is pounding, something bad is definitely on the way.”

You have to keep in mind that the rate of cognitive errors is much higher than this number, but the major errors and the main ones are the ones mentioned here.

Now the question arises how to recognize these mistakes and act to eliminate them so that we can have a better understanding and interpretation of ourselves and the environment and people around us so that we are better.

The first point is that you need to recognize the mistakes and then work to correct them. Know that we usually use these errors but we do not know them and we are not aware of it. Usually psychologists in treatment rooms tell us these errors.

But with a finger sensitivity we can become aware of them and first identify our negative feelings such as sadness, anxiety, sadness, dissatisfaction, etc. and then see what thoughts when these feelings reach us. It crosses our minds, these are the familiar cognitive errors that we can write about to see what errors we generally suffer the most and to challenge them.

Challenging cognitive errors means writing them down and thinking about them, such as how I would react if others thought about me, or whether my thinking was right or wrong, and what my flaws were. And it has benefits for myself or others.

There are also techniques that can help a person better recognize their cognitive errors and misconceptions over time and be able to replace them with positive thoughts.

** Question your ideas

Generally, we all think that every thought we have is the truth and revelation of the house, while sometimes we have to criticize and challenge our ideas to recognize the mistakes of our thoughts. Why don’t we make mistakes? Why can’t we misunderstand others and our perceptions? The main cause of mistakes is strong beliefs and rigid and unchangeable frameworks, so we must increase the flexibility of our minds.

Ask yourself, what are the facts that are in line with your beliefs and secondly, what things contradict your opinion?

If you can find evidence of your violation and rejection, it will definitely help you a lot because it is biased in your mind. When you think that your manager or employee is working against you and rejecting you, it is better to look for evidence to contradict you instead of looking for evidence to support your point.

** Estimate the probability of success

It is better to make a decision or comment, take a statistic and really understand why something is good or bad for you or someone is in trouble or whatever. This will reduce the chances of you making a mistake in your decision. So in order to do something, ask yourself what I need to know about it.

** “You may be wrong” Accept this

Always set a percentage for your mistakes in everything from decision making to even predicting a football game or investing in the stock market and more. Every human being can make mistakes in any situation, everyone has the possibility of making mistakes in their predictions.

Even if you look at your past, you will find that in many places you had wrong predictions, judgments and decisions, and it is natural for a person to grow and gain experience with his mistakes.

** Know your feelings and know where to use them

Emotions are quick messages that help you make decisions, so you should not think about putting emotions aside forever and deciding only with logic, such a thing is neither possible nor right, it is better to know that emotions in At the moment, they may make a wrong judgment.

Recognize negative emotions and ignore them and do not let them overwhelm you because they cause worthlessness and a sense of emptiness and unhappiness for Mosha.

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