Freedom in the guise of instinct does not destroy, the threshold of arousal rises – Mehr News Agency | Iran and world’s news
According to the Mehr correspondent, the “Cheragh” program of Channel 5 this week is hosted by Seyedeh Shahnaz Mousavi, a midwife with more than two decades of experience in this field and a master of personality psychology who has more than a decade of experience and activity in this field. The family counselor was a premarital counselor specializing in couple therapy.
Mousavi, referring to the harms that people will suffer if they do not manage and control the boundaries of male-female relationships, said: “It is like saying that if a person does not eat enough and eat a good meal, such a thing is not possible.” Man’s needs are always with him and are being updated, maybe even today he wants a certain food and tomorrow his mood will change. Therefore, we can not say that if a person experiences a relationship with the opposite sex constantly, as a result, he will be ignored due to repeating the relationship or seeing a person of the opposite sex, or in other words, his desire for the opposite sex will disappear. Desire does not disappear, but the threshold of irritability of people changes and rises. Pay attention to the gentleman who has different types of models in the society, including hairstyles, clothes, different types of make-up می بیند, Irritability threshold اش He ascends to his own wife. Now, how much can his wife create visual attractions for her husband that arouse him or make him feel? You have to look at it from this angle as well. So, contrary to the belief of some people in the society who believe that let everyone dress as they like and be free so that men’s eyes get used to it and become normal, this normalization is not an interesting event and is to the detriment of people in the society, both men and women. ; Because the reality is that this desire and instinct does not disappear, but the threshold of men’s irritability rises and leads to a person feeling worse every day.
He pointed out: If we are looking to create a category, we must be sufficiently aware of our mental and physical needs and those around us, and in line with that awareness that we have to seek normalization. The fact is that man has hormones in his body that accompany him in all interactions in every emotion he experiences, including anger, stress, fear, joy, sadness and sexual excitement that are related to our discussion today and due to the relationship between men and women. It is formed, we can say the hormones that are secreted in the human body, the program اش It is not up to the individual to control the production of the hormone in a space and not in a space that the person does not like. It cannot be said that this atmosphere is not suitable today, so do not be thirsty in another space that he determines and the air is better to be thirsty. Thirst is one need, sexual arousal is another need, and unfortunately it can not be said that if a person is drunk too much, then surely thirst will not affect him anymore. There is no normalization, and what people are wrongly normalizing is the rising point of stimulation that this normalization will pave the way for further stress.
Mousavi reminded: we should not be unaware that marriage is a very process process and it can not be said that in a short-term process between a man and a woman, recognition, interest is created and leads to marriage. If it is accompanied by speed, the person may not have enough knowledge and preparation for marriage at all. The effort of all groups working in the field of psychological and family-oriented activities is to try to lead young people to premarital counseling; Because, first of all, young people do not know where they stand and what kind of personality they have. Sometimes when young people are tested for personality during their premarital counseling and are told what their personality is, they are surprised. Oh you Wow, I knew, I felt something, I understood it was not what it should be, but in the end they did not challenge themselves. The need for security, the need for support, the need for attention, the need for love and affection are needs that are within the mental framework of all ی There are people. Some people have these needs more or less severely. The fact is that when a woman is attention-seeking and needs to be seen, if this need occurs outside the realm of privacy and turns into thick makeup and disgusting cover-ups, in fact such a person will meet this need from different perspectives. And the damage that unfortunately follows is very serious. For example, a very beautiful girl came to me with her parents and their problem was that our daughter has many suitors, but unfortunately she is very frustrated with marriage, she does not like to get married and the family does not know how to satisfy her. When this girl had the opportunity to speak easily and without intellectual worries and without judgments, she told me that unfortunately she had entered into a sincere relationship. Oh you He met a gentleman and experienced a very good feeling in that relationship, and with the test I took, his personality was demanding, and this led to more intimacy and passion in that relationship, and unfortunately the other side without He had harmed her privacy, and even this girl had become pregnant, and without discussing the matter with anyone and informing her family, she was facing severe fear and psychological stress. Attentive people are very approving اند. because Confirmation Do not miss the family, unfortunately did not raise this issue with the family. He had solved the problem so hard and this great challenge alone, and this had led to a very serious injury to him, both physically and mentally, and this had happened to the girl between the ages of eighteen and twenty, and seven or eight years. She was stuck in this incident and this lady girl said that if I had a chance again one day and I was eighteen years old, I would not allow any man to enter my privacy and I would hate to be seen by that person or to be liked and attractive.
He stated: The mentality that is formed for many people in adolescence, especially female adolescents, is that they are very interested in being seen; They like to have a cover that everyone can look at. It makes him feel good, and on the other hand, what he needs is relationalism and protectionism. The needs of girls are very different from those of boys. The teenage boy needs to look and attract appearance. Because men and women look at environmental conditions differently; The existence of this difference in the physiology of men and women does not mean that we are better or more enjoyable, but that the two sexes are different. A boy enjoys visual appeal, appearance is very important to him and the whole Nagar Is and from the totality that it has می بیند Experiences pleasure. A girl instinctively seeks support in a relationship. If it is said that girls have more clothing, it is because when a girl has more clothing, she takes on the visual need, the need for the physical attractiveness that exists in men. In other words, there is a kind of law in this regard that two One way Is. In the first stage, men should control their gaze, and on the other hand, women should not have provocative clothing. This rule is defined for both of them. It is not just that women are told to observe the hijab. But the thing to keep in mind is that the harm done to men by looking at women hurts them, and if a person does not follow the law because someone else does not follow it, they are actually hurting themselves. For example, I had a client, a 35-year-old girl with a social status and education and a great job who was on a par with a gentleman, but unfortunately there was a lot of intimacy, even sexual intercourse took place, but the commitment that should be It shaped marriage, it did not. However, this girl spent five years in a traumatic relationship in an age group that was really hard for her, and most importantly, unfortunately, the man had hurt her a lot and threatened to tarnish her reputation and put her under some pressure. Had given that this lady girl from the family اش He was separated just to be able to have this gentleman by his side more. This young lady had entered into a relationship with the gentleman with the thought that we are older and aware that we are older and aware, because her own intention and intention was to marry, and with the thought that she could be sufficiently prepared for marriage in connection with this gentleman. Avard had been stuck in that relationship for five years. When the girl was sitting in the counseling session, she was crying that if I go back to that time, I will not enter into such a relationship under any circumstances, I will take care of my relationship and try to have a long acquaintance Don’t kill. As consultants in this field suggest, it should not take more than six months to gain knowledge, but with retention قیود And its frameworks. If a relationship lasts more than six months under the pretext of dating and marriage, it is definitely a job می لنگد And it can be said that there is no intention of marriage here. In a relationship that lasts for five years, cognition does not occur at all and is no longer acquaintance, but an insecure and sick attachment.
The expert and family counselor noted in part: Some people believe that a number of men have pathological behaviors, sick اند. So it is better for them to be identified in society, to be separated, and to be treated for the instincts they have and the strong feelings they have for women, not so hard for women. Giri Be. But the fact is that this is not entirely possible; Because there is no label on the forehead of someone who is mentally ill, or masochistic or sadistic. No one can be identified in society with these psychological labels at a glance. Even in social interactions, such people may behave very sensibly and go unrecognized. Assuming we accept that these people should be identified and treated, but this Issue There is no contradiction that women should take care of themselves under any circumstances and not trust anyone, and these should happen in unison. Another important point is that every device has a constructor who, whenever there is a problem in using that device, refers to its manufacturer or communicates with the representation of that device, the same is true of the divine commandments; The great God who created man and was proud of his existence and said, “Blessed is God, the best.” الخالقین, Surely in his creation he has seen the greatness of man who has set such a law for him by definition Issue Muharram and non-Muharram, and in his physiology he has placed something that finds attractions and attractions towards the opposite sex, this limit has been defined to support and protect human beings.
Necessary بذکر Cheragh TV program in the third season, airs on Sundays and Tuesdays around 9 pm on Channel 5 of Sima, discusses a challenge every week, and holds a weekly poll.
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